Operation Pantry Purge Part II: Cereal Killers

To wash down tonight's tastings, we have selected tea as our beverage of choice. There is no way we could thin the tea collection by 30% in the next two weeks, but we show spirit and dedication to the cause all the same.

Tonight, anything breakfast-y gets pulled from the closet. A much smaller pile than the “snacks”.

After condensing the unexpired oatmeal packets, we turn to a box of granola that seems to be leaking granola out the bottom corner. Not a good sign. “It's only moderately stale” Matt says as he chews. I give it the universal thumb over the shoulder sign for “pitch it”. Another granola gets the ax because it tastes ew. Not sure if that is due to age or intention by Bare Naked brand. Swig of tea.

I wonder how we are going to make a dent in this oatmeal/cereal in the next two weeks if we only eat it for breakfast on Saturdays and we're going away the next two weekends... You're supposed to bring your hosts a gift, right???

Belgian waffle mix. Status: less than a quarter cup. Um..... that's enough for like one pancake.

Unproccessed wheat bran, ~ ¾ cup. The back of the box has recipes so I look up what we can make with only that much. Meatloaf or bran dinner rolls. “Wheatloaf?” Matt says. “Yuck! You're going to have to sneak that in if you want me to eat it...”

Quaker oatmeal. Best before Jan 2008. Guess we haven't made oatmeal raisin cookies in a while. Hard to tell if it's really “bad”, but it's nearly 6 years old and opened, so I give it the boot. Matt wants to keep the container however, as it has re-usability potential. “It's a good quality item. If you don't mind my asking, how much did she set you back?” he quote-jokes.

“Look at all these other products Silver Palate makes!” Matt shows me the Silver Palate brand oatmeal box and points at a picture of a jelly jar: “Chutney is my horse's name.”
“You have a horse?” I inquire.
“Well, it would be my horse's name if I had one. Or my Southern daughter.”

So far we have reclaimed two chip clips.

This is how the 7 boxes of cereals (that we only eat on the weekends or for lazy dinners) fared:

1. Frosted flakes: still crispy and don't expire until next month. “Non-nutritive cereal varnish. coats and seals the flake, keeps the milk from penetrating it.” (keep those National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation quotes rolling, Matt!) Kept.
2. Spidey berry: Weren't good to begin with and expired. Thus, axed.
3. Spartan crisp rice: several years past and still crispy! But pitched out of principle because the cute child on the front is probably in college by now.
4. Corn Chex: not expired but not fresh...
5. Barbara's shredded oats: expired this year but not bad.
6. Honey Nut Cheerio: just expired but the flavor remains.
7. Golden Grahams: unopened and unexpired.

I spot another box of wheat bran hiding amongst the brownies! Unopened and hardly expired. Unfortunately, we don't have any ingredients in the house to make any of the recipes besides the “wheatloaf” so Matt's still out of luck.

Brownie mix tower

Lastly, judging that oatmeal may not make the best hostess gifts after all, we jump ahead and take stock of the boxed dessert mixes: 7 brownie, 3 cake, 1 bread, and 1 tiramisu. Two are selected for immediate production. We clearly have more work to do in this area...